Trust

I've been thinking about leadership and teaching recently.  Perhaps it's the result of being out of school for the first time, perhaps it's the result of being so far away from people and practices to which I am familiar and sought regular guidance.  The weekly cello lessons, studio class, Tae Kwon Do practice, resources which drew a familiar leader out from within me.  Community organizing, auditions and recital opportunities, my own teaching.

There are so many ways and forms of leading and recently I've been reflecting on how one finds that inner leader or teacher.  Sometimes it can be very hard to self-generate such a thing.  School and education is such a privilege.  The words of great leaders are such a comfort. To be cradled in the care of someone of great strength, or wisdom, or tenacity, or patience, or whatever it is that makes us trust someone.  That they can guide us closer to ourselves; that they know what and where that is more than we know it.

But I feel that I as grow older, it becomes harder to find a single sacred person able to carry such responsibility for me.  There are so many.  But somehow I must find it in myself.  A mix of intuition and knowing, of being drawn towards something and moving towards it of my own volition.  What is of value to me?  What am I trying to create in this world?

And to trust in it.  To trust in following myself.  To listen more deeply to see what's there.