There were a lot of surprises in today's concert, beyond the ones that Haydn composed into his Surprise Symphony. Quite of few of us are sick, which compromises focus, and the remainder (or perhaps there was some overlap) had had a fun time celebrating a birthday the night before. We all took our turn passing the humility. Our conductor (also the clarinet soloist for the evening) had a funny habit in rehearsals and the performances of acknowledging mistakes with a smirk in the offender's direction. No chance at hiding or faking the audience into believing that they had misheard or that the piece really goes that way.
Despite being uncomfortable in my sickness, I'm really enjoying it's peacefulness. My mind is generally too tired to be overly judging of myself or others, and I allow myself to go as slowly as I like–moving, breathing, listening, responding, thinking. There's something very wonderful about the experience of being sick. It seems to provide an opportunity to exercise forgiveness and to accept the forgiveness and help of others. There were many smirks during the concert today, but there was also a communal feeling of working together in difficult conditions. It would be nice to remember the feeling and work from that space during the times of getter energy and concentration.